HOROSCOPES! Zombie Apocalypse Edition 9.13.14

This Week’s Question:  What role would you play in a zombie apocalypse?

             Aries, March 21- April 19:

 Engineer- You make gadgets and gizmos to make your group feel more secure. Whether it’s a nuclear weapon or a high tech security gate, they name it and you can build it.

            Taurus, April 20- May 20:  Warrior- You can kick butt like nobody’s business! You protect your group and will go to any length to make sure they’re safe. In a battle, you’d pin down a filthy, rotten corpse in 3 seconds flat.

             Gemini, May 21- June 20: Extra #2– Sadly, you get eaten within the first 18 hours of being acquainted with your group. You weren’t much help anyways…

             Cancer, June 21- July 22:  Homemaker- You keep the group grounded when it gets crazy, kind of like a parent figure. You remind people to keep their sanity and without you, people would be eating each other… and i’m not talking about the zombies.

             Leo, July 23- August 22: Helpless adolescents- You hide a lot. You are currently still learning how to use weapons because the closest thing you’ve ever had is a Nerf gun. The group protects you because, after all, you’re just a helpless little Carl…erm…I mean kid.

              Virgo, August 23- September 22: Nurse- You rehabilitate people back to health with a truck load of antibiotics…well you try anyways.

             Libra, September 23- October 22: Forager- You search for anything you can find. Half used batteries? you can use those, Box of old granola bars? HECK YEAH! You also look out for dead animals that aren’t infected so you can feed your group. R.I.P Clifford, you will be missed.

             Scorpio, October 23- November 21: Leader- You guide the group. What are we gonna do next? asks Leo.Well you know! You always have a plan, and even if you don’t, you sure do look like you do.

            Sagittarius, November 22- December 21: Crazy old person- Why are you even here? How do you help the group? HOW ARE YOU EVEN ALIVE?!?!?!? so many questions, so little time.

           Capricorn, December 22– January 19:  Logical Thinker- You are the second in command. You help the leader figure out his game plan. You are especially useful because of your knowledge and intelligence.

           Aquarius, January 20- February 18: Scientist- You try to find a cure for this weird disease. You collect data and and samples for research. If this were GhostBusters, you’d be Egon Spengler.

          Pisces, February 19- March 20:Security- You keep watch on top of your groups shelter. There’s no way a zombie is getting through your defense! Anyone who dares come close, you’ll sharp shoot.

Written by Gal